TKC BREAKING AND EXCLUSIVE NEWS!!! KANSAS CITY BLAME GAME: CELEBRATE TOP 5 PEOPLE RESPONSIBLE FOR THE ROYALS LOSING THE WORLD SERIES!!!
Let's not deny the petty and passively aggressive nature of this godforsaken cowtown by pretending that a tragic second place finish is good enough.
Kansas City hates losing and losers just as much as anybody else.
To wit . . .
CHECK THIS KICK-ASS LIST OF THE TOP 5 PEOPLE KANSAS CITY SHOULD BLAME FOR THE SOUL-CRUSHING WORLD SERIES DEFEAT!!!
This is the FIRST and DEFINITIVE guide to the blame game that goes beyond the scope of fanboy chatter that will consume another 29 years of mostly worthless sports radio.
Let's make it hot . . .
Blame George Brett And His Kansas City "Legacy" For The Royals Inability To Move Forward
More than a generation has passed since George Brett's big Royals win and the guy still hasn't stopped hanging around the locker room.
Sure, the connection with the past is comforting but it's also limiting . . . As a blogger who lives in his mom's basement, trust me, I know about these things.
Anyhoo . . . The George Brett "legacy" tainted the 2014 Kansas City Royals and made it virtually impossible for the team to find its own identity.
As we noted previously . . .
THE KANSAS CITY ROYALS NEED TO DUMP GEORGE BRETT IN ORDER TO MOVE FORWARD!!!
As long as Brett is hanging around the Royals will NEVER achieve greatness.
Peregrine Honig And Her Illicit Panties Share Responsibility For Kansas City Royals Defeat
While Peregrine's underwear consume our thoughts daily . . . The Homeland Security panty raid proved too distracting for the Royals to overcome. Moreover, the Kansas City Peregrine Honig "Pantygate" Homeland Security controversy kinda reminded us that the World Series exists is a broader political context that mainly serves to crush our hopes and dreams or at least limit our aspirations toward greatness.
Yes, Alex Gordon TOTALLY Could Have Made It Home And Ned Yost Hasn't Redeemed Himself At All
For the record, Alex Gordon left Kansas City 90 feet away from a real shot at winning the World Series and the blame lies typical Ned Yost incompetence. He never was a decent manager. Royals playoff success was a fluke and if the team was serious about winning, Yost would be rewarded with his walking papers.
Suburbanites Like The Marlins Man Cursed The Kansas City Royals
Where are these people from? They're not from KC Proper. Amid World Series celebration that was too expensive for broke-ass Kansas City residents the stadium was filled with fakers from JoCo and surrounding rural areas along with a clown in the orange clothes. This was a big difference betwixt now and 1985. Kansas City was better represented at the ballpark 29 years ago . . . Over the past week the place looked more like a shopping mall that was totally unrepresentative of the real Kansas City.
More Than Anyone Else, Paul Rudd Is Responsible For The Royals Losing The World Series.
Like it or not, TKC told you Paul Rudd jinxed the Kansas City Royals. He was the first opportunistic douche to make this event all about his b-list movie career with very little concern about the team or Kansas City. So, I guess we're not getting that kegger after all, right?
Seriously, Paul Rudd might seem like an adorable, friendly, non-threatening low-level celebrity. But more than anyone else . . . Paul Rudd represents the fake, corporate mediocrity that has consumed Kansas City amid the World Series and inevitably cost this cowtown so much devastating heartache. Natch.