Because we want you d-bags to be safe tonight . . Here are a few quick guildlines . . .
TKC TIP #1 - ANYTHING SAID TO YOU TONIGHT BY SOMEONE WHO WANTS TO HAVE SEX WITH/ON YOU IS A LIE!!!
Kind of working against myself here . . . But I'm a generous soul and would like to give hottie skanks a fair chance.
TKC TIP #2 - IT REALLY IS AMATEUR NIGHT. IN GENERAL, JUST BE CAREFUL!!!
I'll be in my (mom's) basement most of the night . . . Safe, protected and engaging in combat via X-box. The rest of you are on your own.
TKC TIP #3 - THINK OF IT AS JUST ANOTHER NIGHT AND YOU'LL BE FINE AND LESS INCLINED TO DO SOMETHING STUPID!!!
They say that 2012 is the end of the world. However, newsies, religious people and zealots of all sorts are usually wrong . . . Just something to consider.
MORE INFO . . .
A NICE WAY TO START THE NEW YEAR . . . BILL NIGRO'S BAD IDEA WILL BE OFFERING A TOUR OF BARS . . .
Many options available for getting a safe ride home on NYE
FOR ONE NIGHT . . . MAYBE KANSAS CITY CAN PUT THE GUNS AWAY . . .
Police: Don't shoot guns this New Year
TKC needs to keep readers, so it's in my best interest to get you bags back here in once piece.
Sage advice, take heed young bucks.
ReplyDeleteFuck, I'm sitting home alone with a 6 pack of Blvd Wheat and box of cookies.
ReplyDeleteThis sucks.
I made Sangria earlier hoping to be awake at midnite to make a little noise and other than that going to chill and watch the Three Stooges Marathon on IFC.
ReplyDeleteYou sad bastards are really starting to bum me out.
ReplyDeleteI'll be out at the P&L doing jello shots off of some coed flatbellys, while I try and decide which one of them gets to gobble my gooey cone before I pass out.