Tony's Kansas City

Kansas City Smoking Ban teaches next generation about hypocrisy and politics

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Mon, 12 May 2008 10:05:00 +0000

Tough restrictions on smoking send a useful message to young people . . . Mainly that cancer prevention and public health is a lot less important when tax revenues and powerful special interests are involved.

The column in which Mike Hendrics attempts to allay his white guilt

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Mon, 12 May 2008 10:02:00 +0000

Just once I'd love it if suburban white people could talk about ethnic cultures without mentioning food . . . F*cking pigs.

Comprehensive David Cook Coverage (ugh)

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Mon, 12 May 2008 08:23:00 +0000

Conservatism with Heart offers the ultimate David Cook roundup . . . I guess it's not that bad when you consider that other "conservative roundups" involve me and my Grandma being deported "back" to Southeast Asia.

Undead link: Kansas City Zombie Walk

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Mon, 12 May 2008 08:14:00 +0000

Found this one courtesy of Emaw's blog and if you haven't already checked out the photo set of Kansas City's Zombie Walk . . . Well then you should.

Local photo blogger Zach captures some amazing images of Zombies walking through Westport, during the day no less, they usually don't show up until about 2 a.m. and they're out for breakfast and booty . . . Brains, not so much.

Hey Kansas City, Aggregate this!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Mon, 12 May 2008 05:42:00 +0000

I've never been a fan of groups, teams, clubs or associations . . . Most of the time they're just an excuse for people to stop thinking and I think this also applies online.

The thing I like about blogs is that they most often express the work of one individual in a sea of similar content . . . The blogger who stands out to any reader represents a special kind of connection that's unique in the history of media or at least as gully as that old Piña Colada song.

Anyhoo mostly because people are weak minded or don't think they merit enough attention on their own, they seek out groups to support their opinions, demographics or agenda.

I came across yet another Kansas City online group (that admittedly looks kinda cool) that's trying to lay claim to this town's niche online space.

Meet:

The Kansas City Online Community

It's not a bad idea and they've already amassed a nice following.

Still, I'm always suspicious of groups because I'm a student of History and I know it's a shorter step than most people think from bake sales and brownies to goose stepping and mass deportations . . . Or so I've been told.

Anyhoo, what's great about the local Internet scene is that there is a never ending stream of these little communities that always pop up from time to time and they all provide an understanding of the local net that's unique. Also, there's usually at least one or two hot broads in the crew who are down to "make new friends" which usually means banging a few new guys.

It's all good . . . But it shouldn't persuade bloggers or any singular online presence from pursing their own agenda. Remember, that it has been proven that there is a niche market for nearly everyone on the Internets.

It's simply a matter of attracting a crowd . . . I've found images and links of half naked white women work best.

Sleepy comeback from a long weekend

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Mon, 12 May 2008 05:03:00 +0000

So, by now most of you with families are probably tired of them . . . Thankfully, Monday is here and the weekend will be a distant memory by about 8:30 a.am.

Over the weekend my family conversation mostly revolved around even more Catholic hypocrisy and the losing battle against violent crime in Kansas City. TKC Interesting Fact: No less than 3 childhood acquaintances of mine have been killed in the past 5 years because of the burgeoning drug game in Kansas City . . . The more you know.

We've got a lot of ground to cover . . . I'm gonna start looking for photos of scantily clad women in order to spice up the mostly downbeat news. Stay tuned.

The TKC Saturday Night Vidcast: I'm celebrating MILFs like your mother!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Sat, 10 May 2008 22:55:00 +0000

This blog is written from my mom's basement so obviously I have a vested interest in keeping Mother's Day sacred, I may even scrape together a few nickels I've made and venture outdoors to buy my mom a card . . . But this isn't about me, it's about your mother.

I have no idea why but for some reason there has been an abundance of older broads going around half naked in order to prove that the ravages of time and childbearing can be delayed or at least cleverly masked with Photoshop . . . And I'm not just referring to Madonna.

Here are a few are just a few examples of older lady, mommy ass that have been thrust upon us by the media (click the image for a bio):

The upshot of this welcomed phenomena of horny older mothers (heh) is that the average Kansas City hausfrau has become even more skanky.

On a recent trip to the Crossroads and the P&L District I noticed that the whole "Cougar" movement of older ladies out on the prowl was in full effect. TKC note to myself: Be sure to buy stock in make-up companies and exceedingly dark nightclubs.

Therefore, instead of the weekly compilation of songs I'm simply going to advise everyone, if they are lucky, to tell their mom that they love them this weekend . . . Or I will. And in the spirit of Mother's Day and that fact that I know that women love being appreciated almost as much as they love money, enjoy this timeless clip from Kennedy entitled "Your Mama":

Anyhoo . . . Because now older ladies and moms in this cowtown are being told by the media that skanky is a good look for the few 40 year-old(ish) broads who don't happen to be morbidly obese, I'm dedicating this Mother's Day post to MILFS and that fact that booty is now undergoing a "vintage" phase.

Finally, it's probably equally important that I reveal a personal realization that I've come to recently which is simple and the kind of thing that most adults comprehend long before I did . . . No matter how horrible, evil or reprehensible a person is regarded, at one time or another they most likely had a mother who adored them.

I LOVE YOU MAMA!!!

Thank you for reading this week . . . Have a safe and fun weekend.

The Best of Kansas City Bloggers: Weekend Warriors Doing Battle Edition!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Sat, 10 May 2008 21:16:00 +0000

I could do better this weekend but I'm busy not trying in other aspects of my life.

Sooooooooo, here are some of Kansas City's best blog posts that I've been reading:

Some Kansas City bloggers care about important local issues. KC Sponge is a perfect example: "Why you should give a shit about kids and their education"

MORE EXCLUSIVE CRIME DETAILS FROM ALONZO WASHINGTON: Man shot by the police was not driving a stolen car!!!!

Nick Sloan serves up one of the best sports analysis in all of local media: "Ranking Kansas City's Coaches"

JoCo SOB comes up with some FANTASTIC COMMENTS REGARDING BIKE WEEK!!!

May's Machete just might be the most awesome lady in all of the KC blogosphere. Here's proof and it involves your girlfriend complaining about your taste in movies: "Why I Can't Wait to See Kingdom of the Crystal Skull"

RDM: The Midtown Miscreant is Kansas City's Must Read Blog!!!

RDM is a must read as well as far as I'm concerned.

TKC EXCLUSIVE!!! MAMMY-GATE CONTINUES IN KANSAS CITY!!! MAYOR FUNKY'S OFFICE COULD SOON BE FACING A FEDERAL CIVIL RIGHTS COMPLAINT!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 15:25:00 +0000

The case regarding the use of racial slurs in the Mayor's office continues.

Word around the campfire is that the period for the arbitration and consideration of the EEOC complaint is just about up (90-120 days) and the victim of racial slurs in Mayor Funky's office could soon file a federal case citing a violation of her civil rights over the clear cut case of pay disparity and the well-documented use of racial slurs and intolerant attitudes within the Funkhouser Administration.

Let's also take into account that, in a separate instance, the actions and words of Gloria Squitiro also caused the departure of the highest ranking African-American female in the Funkhouser Administration given that the woman in question in that case was rudely referred to as "Bernie Mac" repeatedly by the first lady of Kansas City.

So far the mainstream media has failed to discuss the details of the case and a simple question that looms on the mind of almost every City Hall watcher:

IF GLORIA SQUITIRO, AN UNPAID VOLUNTEER, IS THE CAUSE OF A LAWSUIT . . . WILL KANSAS CITY HAVE TO PAY THE BILL FOR HER DEFENSE?

It's a simple question but I really don't know the answer . . . Certainly, TKC doesn't think this town should have to pay for the Mayor's wife calling an African-American female "Mammy." The ambiguity over tab in this scenario is due to Mayor Funkhouser leaving the role of Ms. Squitiro horribly unclear and undefined . . . It's a real liability to his office even though most of us understand that she's the Co-Mayor. Sadly, the media doesn't question the first couple when they openly call one of their employees, supporters and supposedly a long time friend a liar on the airwaves all over town. The personal attacks endured by this woman who worked harder than anyone else to get Funkhouser elected truly illustrate the misguided and mean-spirited nature of Funkhouser loyalists.

Meanwhile, the Mayor's credibility continues to sink and his stubborn and misleading insistence that his wife didn't use the racial slur not only discounts this City Hall worker who has no reason to lie but also alienates the Mayor from the vast majority of the people in Kansas City who understand a simple truth:

MAYOR FUNKHOUSER'S WIFE HAS NO PLACE IN CITY HALL AND IT'S TIME FOR HER TO LEAVE!!!

The looming EEOC complaint and now the prospect of a lawsuit make it clear that Squitiro has been nothing but a detrimental force in the Mayor's office. The free parking space and desk at City Hall are a clear cut case of nepotism and if she wasn't the Mayor's wife . . . The call for her job would have been echoed by mainstream media outlets long ago. Sadly, so many columnists in this town are cowards and they don't want to hurt Mayor Funky's feelings. Yet, at this point the Mayor's personal loyalty needs to be expressed at home and not in Kansas City's highest office. It is past time for the Mayor to end his stubborn defense of his wife's unsanctioned, distracting and divisive presence in City Hall.

GLORIA SQUITIRO MUST GO!!!

It's time to force her to put her shoes on and escort her from the building. She has cost the Mayor most of his credibility and now threatens to make the people of Kansas City pay for both her inappropriate behavior along with her husband's stubborness, inexperience and bad judgment.

Wake Up Kansas City!!! David Cook is a d-bag with no talent!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 14:00:00 +0000

It's David Cook Day in Kansas City. Ugh.

Here are the top 10 reasons everyone should discourage any celebration:

10. Does it really matter? If the answer is yes, then you're probably Paula Abdul.

9. He's not even from KC . . . This is a celebration is for a guy from Blue Springs (or wherever) who probably dreamed of leaving that hell hole every minute of his life.

8. If this photo above is any indication, the dude wears lipstick and that's just as creepy as his faux Country music twang style.

7. When the name "David Cook" is mentioned 3 months from now in Kansas City no one will have any idea who you're talking about . . . Example: Has anyone heard from Taylor Hicks?

6. It's just wrong that young white women set the agenda for local news coverage. Can't we at least wait till one of them disappears before handing over control of the airwaves to the affluent white broads?

5. I contend that American Idol is racist . . . I don't know how but give me about 5 minutes and I'm sure I can find something.

4. Almost nobody turned out for the last election, there is WAY MORE interest in this David Cook Dude and for that both you and your children should be slapped.

3. David Cook and the P&L District combined could form an apex of bland, generic entertainment that collapses into itself like some kind of dying supernova. Be careful!!! I'm all for letting the bland lead the bland but this level of douchery could be dangerous.

2. C'mon, please realize there has not been one artist of merit to come from the American Idol TV show . . . It's a TV show for William Hung's sake (!!!) and the mediocre, insipid and marginally talented hopefuls make The Monkees look like David Bowie by comparison.

1. I haven't heard or seen him perform but if he was any good he'd already be on some kind of cell phone or Ipod commercial so I think we can all safely assume the guy isn't worth all of this hoopla.

Tell all hip-hop book just might hint that Larry Johnson is the ghey!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 12:12:00 +0000

Sadly, the Kansas City blogosphere is overwhelmingly white so I'm not surprised that even Chiefs fans haven't picked up the gossip that's heating up the rest of the blogosphere.

It seems that some the ghey guy has written a tell all book about the many "Down low" African-American dudes in the rap game AND in pro sports.

The title: Hiding in Hip-Hop.

How does this relate to Kansas City?

Well, TKC has previously reported that LJ may in fact be a homersexual given that he's shacking up with Jay-Z even though the two guys could obviously afford their own places even in New York, even in this recession.

In fact, for Kansas City d-bags who don't know a thing about hip-hop . . . The fact that LJ pledges his allegiance to Jay-Z after every touchdown has always struck me as kind of the ghey.

And while this kind of groundbreaking reporting might be viewed as speculation among Kansas City's media elite (who are mostly the ghey themselves) . . . One of the hip-hop world's foremost authorities has stated plainly that he thinks Larry Johnson is the guy named in the tell all the ghey hip-hop book. Check it:

My guess as to who this might be: You guessed it, none other than Kansas City Chief and male Roc-A-Wear model Larry Johnson, who shares an apartment in New York with Jay-Z despite the fact that the two of them could obviously afford places by themseves. How do I know it’s Larry Johnson? Well, to be honest with you, I don’t know jack shit about football, and he’s the only DL football player I know of, let alone one who’s been known to be around a lot of music industry people. But come on. Who else could it be? Don’t let me find out Jay-Z is involved in this shit as well.

There's no arguing it - That's an expert opinion and I think there's already been a clear indication that LJ is definitely the ghey given that LJ has been seen by a huge audience on Youtube kissing some man named Fantasia.

Of course, NO HOMO on this whole post and Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!

Let's tie it all together

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 12:11:00 +0000

Here are a some important links that I should have posted earlier . . . Still, they're pretty good:

A recent fatal shooting involving the KCPD is creating a lot of stir and is currently the top story of every local media outlet in town . . . It could get ugly.

The witnesses say the suspect that police killed did not have a gun!!!

I'm telling you this town is exceptionally cruel: Gas Station Clerk Fired After Being Robbed

Supremacy is still the game of choice in Kansas City: Men Were Playing Game to Kill a Black Person

Detectives in Blair case start talking to TV . . . Again.

The angle on this story so close to mother's day has me kind of bummed out, I'm not made of stone: Mother On Phone with Son When He Was Shot, Killed

Making a gunshot work for Grandma: Shooting Victim Donates Kidney To Grandma

JoCo people are nosy: So many people clicked on the Johnson County sheriff's new online warrant-checking system that the site crashed

The Tony Frank$ Review

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 12:10:00 +0000

Kansas City is home to a diverse array of artists and since TKC is all about celebrating the many cultures which call Kansas City home . . . I took special notice of a guy who goes by the moniker: Tha Unchallenged Truth - Tony Frank$

Of course the people who read this blog are nothing but haters but I have to say that I found the music to be pretty captivating.

I especially like the tracks:

Block Boi Rough Cut

Welcome to Kansas City (of course)

The artist has promise and I have to admit this is the first time I was inspired to listen to any new hardcore/gangsta rap in recent memory.

Now obviously, I'm wasn't even going to think about writing a negative review about somebody who holds a shotgun in half their publicity photos . . . However, I think there might be an interesting subtext that folks could easily overlook: Tony Frank$ has great lyrics, interesting hooks and the beats on the tracks that I listened to were far better than the stuff that passes for mainstream hip-hop on the radio.

Of course there is the subject of image and Hardcore/gangsta rap is not everyone's cup of tea . . . However, two white guys claiming Eastside, rapping about a lifestyle that makes an episode of The Wire seem tame by comparison: That takes courage in this day and age. Like it or not, Tony Frank$ is worth a listen if only to understand that Kansas City's hip-hop roots are inexorably linked to hardcore/gangsta rap no matter how much local music critics would like to think otherwise.

Boycott Bike Week in Kansas City!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 12:07:00 +0000

Just a couple of minutes ago The Pitch posted a great compilation of activities slated for Bike Week.

I was trying really hard to let this one slide but I just can't see how this Weak Ass "Bike Week" does anybody any good.

Unless middle-class white people patting each other on the back for pushing pedals of luxury bikes can be used to power the City . . . It's obviously self-indulgence put on display as some kind of civic duty, (heh duty) which is a complete load of crap.

KC snitches deserve riches not stitches!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 12:06:00 +0000

Okay, that mo'money, mo'problems song finally makes sense to me now given that more than $1 million has been paid out by Kansas City Crimestoppers since 1982.

I don't know how well it's working considering all of the recent killings but it could be viewed as an economic stimulus of sorts given that bullet proof vests are far more affordable nowadays.

Still, it's a good idea to provide some kind of reward to encourage people to stick their neck out and speak up in a city that would much rather keep the abundance of violent crime a secret.

Kansas City Bloggers are the light of my life (not really)

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 11:54:00 +0000

Good morning . . . Here's the best of the local blogs that I was looking at:

Wondering about this weekend? Mary-Anne makes planning it much easier for those of you who won't be hiding in your mother's basement and playing X-box . . . Losers.

Comprehensive coverage of the kid recently killed on his bike . . . I'm not even gonna clown this link because it's a sad story and TKC believes that every baby biker deserves the right to grow up to become an annoying hippie who mistakenly thinks they're doing the world a favor by getting in the way of more important traffic. Sadly, this young soul didn't get a chance to join the rest of the obnoxious d-bags in Kansas City.

Urban Tour roundup: The last gasp of the condo crowd

A pretty great local music post and review: "Knuckleheads is every bit as welcoming as the Main Street institution."

Mike Hendricks is an ass and it's no surprise he is getting behind the Star's light rail plan

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 11:40:00 +0000

Mike "Humorless, Hack" Hendricks recently filed a column supporting the Star's starter line light rail approach. It's no big surprise that he's clandestinely pushing the plan of his employer but the fact that the JoCo jerk is backing a mass transit plan that doesn't transport masses of people is a tad troubling . . . Of course the his view from the Golden Ghetto might be skewed but I challenge anyone to prove how moving people form Crown Center to Downtown is going to make a difference in anyone's life but contractors and architects. Also, now that The Star is ramping up support for the stupid plan they've once again proven that their opinion pages are just about equal (but far less interesting) than any blogger in the metro given that they're not providing a glimpse of opinion in the metro but really just pushing their own agenda.

UNSPOKEN TRUTH: KANSAS CITY IS THE MURDER CAPITAL OF THE MIDWEST!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 10:12:00 +0000

There have been six people killed in the past seven days in Kansas City.

The weekend is coming . . . There will be more.

If the Johnson County editors at Kansas City's paper of record had any courage they would print this information above the fold in 36-point-type with exclamation points . . . Instead the news is buried in the local section because it doesn't really impact the lives of the d-bag columnists and editors in the suburbs.

As usual, MAYOR MARK FUNKHOUSER HAS PROVIDED ABSOLUTELY NO LEADERSHIP ON THE SUBJECT OF VIOLENT CRIME IN KANSAS CITY and now the majority of his time is being spent debating an imaginary light rail plan with Clay Chastain.

And still more people will die in Kansas City this weekend while so many middle-class media folks read and report this devastating news as if they're reciting a laundry list.

The recent spate of homicides in Kansas City is a problem affecting everyone who lives in this town, but the majority of us (white people) are ignoring it.

Young, mostly minority males are being slaughtered en masse in Kansas City . . . Sadly, the majority of the excitement in local media coverage today is being directed toward David Cook. Media people offer lame excuses about demographics, the structure of the local media market and all sorts of reasons for their lack of coverage . . . But the blame isn't all theirs. Time after time it has become clear that the people in this town don't care when people of color are killed which is one of many reasons that Kansas City is a horribly racist, cruel and backward town and people would most likely take offense to the preceding remark than the constant stream of homicides and blood on our streets.

Focus on the future

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 08:22:00 +0000

Expect Voter photo ID rhetoric to ramp up as the issue heads toward the Missouri Senate.

Here's what two of the best bloggers that I follow are writing about the subject:

"Some older people and poor people may not have a picture I.D., so why should they be denied the right to vote for that reason alone?"

"Democrats continue to scream about how unfair it is require a photo id to vote."

Personally, I think it's a bad idea but if we must have to provide a form of identification in order to vote I believe that TKC should be allowed to request that all blonde, big booty MILFS show me their boobs in order to cast a ballot. It's only fair and it makes as much sense and the other efforts requiring people to jump through hoops to participate in Democracy.

It's all about product placement

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 08:21:00 +0000

Kudos to the Irish Fest blog for posting the most creative product tie-in I've ever read in the Kansas City blogosphere. Check it:

Mis amigos, the Fiesta Kansas City opens mañana at Crown Center, home of the Kansas City Irish Fest, which opens itself in just 113 days.

And every time I think I have a hard time coming up with content I'm reminded that the Irish fest blog has to find a way to post on pretty much the same subject every day.

JoCo Controversy: Flying Tambourine forces teacher into retirement!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 08:20:00 +0000

Supremacy and privilege stay winning by protecting their young against dangerous flying instruments and teachers enforcing minimal rules of conduct:

The accident came about when the 58-year-old music teacher instructed the children to put down their instruments. Police said one girl wouldn’t let go of her tambourine so the teacher took it from her and tried to toss it behind him onto a desk. While doing so it struck a boy who went home with a cut on his chin and bruises on his arm.

His parents contacted police and pressed charges. Blue Valley District officials said the teacher tendered his retirement as a result.

And when people wonder why there are so few people who want to go into teaching (as a first choice) they might want to remember this story and realize that because of school systems that don't support teachers and pain-in-the-ass parents . . . A percussion instrument could be the final insult in a career that doesn't pay enough.

Aquila has Missouri in a chokehold and easily demonstrates who has the real power

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 08:19:00 +0000

In Missouri, corporations own the the air you breathe . . . Kind of like a bad (ass) Schwarzenegger flick.

Recently, he Senate voted to bail out Aquila today in a 26-5 vote that gives retroactive approval for a power plant the company built in Cass county, despite court orders forbidding it to do so. Missouri State Senator from KC, Jolie Justus was one of the 5 NO votes.

On her blog, she offers the money quote that pretty much sums up the whole situation:

"I don't see any real punishment from the state for Aquila blatantly ignoring the law."

But breathe easy, when the time comes that you are a rich, white male and have a ton of government connections . . . You can break any law you please . . . In fact, you might even be able to write a few of your own.

Also, I feel sorry for anybody who actually believes that "This is a nation of laws" BS when referring to illegal immigrants who are mostly here to clean up dishes rather than pollute the enviornment while ignoring any kind of regulation or governing bodies.

Filegirl is sweet!!!

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 08:18:00 +0000

For my money, Filegirl is probably one of the best lady bloggers in the metro area and recently she filed a sugary sweet post that almost qualifies as foodie porn (with pics!!!).

Warning: If you don't have diabetes now, you'll probably have it after checking out her post but it's not like the corporate lobby putting refined sugar into everything wasn't going to give it to you anyway.

Another Great KC Photog Blog

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 08:17:00 +0000

I'm a big fan of Kansas City photog blogs . . . Just found a new one that offers a nice combination between personal and commercial work. The P.Binder.Photography blog is pretty damn good and well worth checking out for quite a few images of Kansas City.

Camera ready

noreply@blogger.com (Tony) — Fri, 09 May 2008 06:28:00 +0000

Here's some random links to start the day considering that most of you are just phoning it in by around 11:25 a.m. anyway:

The Westport Flea Market is STILL apparently home to the best hamburgers in Kansas City . . . TKC Note: I still giggle whenever anyone mentions the annual crab festival.

Yesterday was "Kansas City Charity Day" so I pretended to flirt with a fat woman.

For the love of God, The Flying Saucer is now open!!! I don't want to read anymore about it since The KC Beer Blog covered it first a week ago (and much better than everybody else).

As always the Event Driver posts a pretty good list of Kansas City weekend music links - The first dude to mention David Cook is ghey. No homo.

Another great post from Jay Bird: "The end for the Kansas dominated Republican Legislature"