TKC spent most of last night in my mom's basement, alone and dominating X-Box Live as usual.
However, I was all out of snack cakes and Cheetos and I needed some form of sustenance. A blogger cannot live on 64 ounce servings of Dr. Pepper from QT alone.
So I journeyed to The Plaza to pick up a salad from a restaurant before closing time. One of the finest things in life is to stroll into a place as the wait staff is cleaning up and monopolize the time of people simply wanting to go home. Actually, that's a bit further down the list of finer things. The BEST thing in life are to crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.
But rudely taking advantage of Kansas City politeness comes pretty close.
Anyoo . . .
I made sure my salad order had no less than 8 customizations and I also scored free bread. Having made my server come close to the verge of tears I happily strolled into the night air without leaving a tip. I also insulted one of the busboys in Arabic, which was doubly funny because he was Chinese. In fact it was a triple insult score given that I learned the vulgar phrase in the comment section of another blog when Osama's cousin did some scantily clad magazine photos. But I digress . . .
Feeling my usual sense of smug self -satisfaction and making an old white woman clutch her purse as I walked by I was happy to catch a nipple slip from some drunk lady goofing off with her friends and taking a photo with the Ben Franklin statue as if she was the first person who ever thought of that lame image.
I looked up from a glace of the quickly sagging boob of a blonde lady doomed to middle-management for the rest of her career and noticed one of those taxpayer subsidized Trolleys coming my way. Not so surprisingly . . .
THE KANSAS CITY STRIP TROLLEY WAS COMPLETELY EMPTY ON THE PLAZA AT A LITTLE AFTER 9PM ON A FRIDAY NIGHT!!!
As if I didn't set the scene enough, let me remind you d-bags that the weather was PERFECT, the Plaza was packed with people and there were enough drunk chicks walking around to perform a comprehensive study on different strains of herpes in the metro area. A few more looks confirmed that ALMOST NOBODY WAS RIDING THE TROLLEY!!!
People were just straight up ignoring the failing bit of KC Club Life Mass Transit.
It's important to remember that this idea was overwhelmingly approved by The Mayor and City Council, it took a sweet $500k loan from Kansas City that will probably never be paid back when it all goes bust and the idea had the stamp of approval from just about EVERYONE involved in local development. The architects of this idea are not alone in this hot mess.
What I noticed last night was ONGOING KC Strip failure. The weather just doesn't get nicer than last night and that's why I made the rare journey outside my mother's basement. What I emerged to see is that the judgment of Kansas City politicos is still screwed up and will remain so for the foreseeable despite so many grand plans.
booty cam
ReplyDeleteJoin the marines, dipshit. Stop being a parasite on your parents and the source of freedom which you obviously take for granted.
ReplyDeleteYou desperately need some order and respect infused into in your pointless existence.
See you at PT's, 0500.
Because being in the marines gives one a purpose in life. Fucking numb nuts. Still, we do need hired goons like police and military, so they deserve respect for filling that mandatory niche to leave creatives like TKC free to work.
ReplyDeleteSo thank you sir, for being willing to have your life decisions made for you by a chain of command.
Word! OH he TOLD YOU son!!!
ReplyDeleteTrolley's still empty ...
ReplyDeleteThat was a great post, Tony. I saw, even so, that you slipped the Mayor and Council into it but that part was nearly painless.
ReplyDeleteGreat creative writing. I actually read the whole thing and enjoyed the endorphin releases at some surprisingly clever lines (for a Latino). Are you SURE you're Mexican?
It's now obvious that free pizza and limo's can get you a lot from this Council.
ReplyDeleteTKC, Please note that is failed trolley and city / taxpayer supported folly was pushed thru by Beth Gottstein! Whom I see from previous posts on this blog is TKC favs. Thank Beth for mispending our tax dollars!
ReplyDelete-Great creative writing-
ReplyDeleteYeah, the tip off that it was fiction was leaving the house for a salad that Tony would have to pay for.
Give Tony some credit, he could have gotten a free ride (George), Salad and Pizza (Nigro)last night if he was corruptible. Instead he called it like it is.The Trolley deal is one of the biggest waste ever in KC and it's all politics. It should end George and Nigro's influence permanently.
ReplyDeleteWhy the hell would drunk
ReplyDeleteWhite people pay for the trolley? There are no DUI checkpoints between the Plaza, Westport and the Power & Light district. Now if they bring their drunk butts on Bruce Watkins then they might get stopped.
I think if it was promoted right and they don't get too impatient, and there were some SERIOUS patron parking lots not patrolled by trolling cops, it would be a great way for night partiers to sample KC's night spots.
ReplyDeleteYou all are spoiled by McDonalds, expecting results in 3 minutes!
If this were linked with a decent transportation system all over the metro, including through JOCO, elsewhere, the only losers would be jailers and defense lawyers who would see way less DWI business!
FWIW, They hide these oil-guzzling monstrosities off of Swift and 12th St. in Northtown.
ReplyDeleteAnd for some reason...It loops the East Crossroads constantly with not a passenger in sight.
Sounds like a good gig if you like to make your money whilst sitting on your ass and driving around K.C.
Bill George is an idiot. I can't believe anyone listens to him.
ReplyDeleteIt could be amusing to have an account of exactly where that $500k went.
ReplyDeleteStrip Trolly is a loser idea.
I applaud Nigro and George for trying something new. The negative posters have no ideas and only complain about everything everyone else is trying.
ReplyDeletehave you noticed that everytime this topic comes up, the same naysayers say virtually the same thing?
ReplyDeleteNot NEW comments by new people. Same one and so I think youre right, 2:15. People who can't even define vision. Wouldn't recognize a good idea until it was already successful.
And never been out of town or used and understood public transportation.
I think its a truism that people who never have good idea never do anything great. People who DO have good ideas will fail with some that don't take, but will win the reward on the rare ones that do.
For example, a lot of people hate wealthy people like Hall or Ford or Gates. They're jealous of their success and know well that they're risk takers. Some people don't have enough self confidence to take risks, and they hate their mediocrity for it.
Tony,why dont you promote Kc instead of tear it down?
ReplyDeleteRadioman and 2:15 you're dreamers who hoped that another politically induced pipe dream might advance your agenda. To address those who are opposed to the Trolley as being "against something new" is an embarrassment to you and shows the routine condescension that most social agenda (transit supporting) liberals usually portray. The Trolley idea was not new. Trolleys have failed numerous times in KC and there was no reason to think they'd do better this time.
ReplyDeleteOne last thing Mr. Radio....the same thing is said each time because the TROLLEY IS EMPTY ALMOST EVERY TIME. The thing should be shut down immediately before George and Nigro burn through all the $. All the while (for the few passengers on it) both routes lead directly to the front door of Nigro's Pizza Parlor.
ReplyDeleteYES THE STOP IS RIGHT AT HIS DOOR!
Get out and see it for yourself. Tony has and he has reported accurately.
I think I mentioned that while the idea of public transportation is a good one, the entire plan has to be ready on the get-go unlike that moron who keeps campaigning for a Light Rail to nowhere.
ReplyDeleteThe free trolley on the nightspots won't work without feeder parking lots in the right places, the right amount of frequency and lots of publicity.
Miss a key part of it and its a boondoggle. So far empty trams should not tell us it was a bad idea, just that it's not working as its currently set up.
Took a long time to get airliners to quit crashing every month in America, but look what's happened now!
Takes vision and good execution. Clearly, some rough edges. Try to be patient. Try to HELP, not just bitch about it! What would make it work?
Ask the people who DON'T ride it but are down there where they COULD be using it.
Radiohead you are clearly out of your mind.
ReplyDeleteRadiohead is awesome. Radioman sucks balls
ReplyDeleteWell, it's pretty hard to have a conversation with Mr Potato head and keep one's mind in tact.
ReplyDeleteShouldn't you one liner night surfers be over on twitter? YOu're just ground clutter on the radar screen of life.
Osmana? Oh! I thought it was Obama's cousin!
ReplyDelete