God listens to talk radio

Professor Paul Mirecki was assaulted yesterday on his way to breakfast. Or, if you love Jesus, that line should have read: God smites Professor Paul Mirecki by way of intelligently designing two rednecks in a pickup truck to deliver a few slaps to the “big fat face” of that smartass.

I don’t know, I’m gonna play scientist (Devil’s advocate? Same thing.) here and wait for more evidence. If you’re not familiar with the KU campus, it’s probably one of the most politically charged places on the planet and I’ve witnessed quite a few incidents that were “manufactured” to prove a greater political point. Not so long ago, a student group sympathetic to the ACLU faked religious outrage by doctoring (removable) graffiti on one of the campus’ religious monuments, the Christians always whine about being victimized and there is never a semester in that place without a perfectly timed bomb threat. It’s just hard for me to buy this assault thing because in my experience, profs only get their ass kicked for screwing the coeds or flunking too many Black students.

Here’s further “reasoning”: Nobody takes Jerry Agar seriously, not even Jerry Agar. Everybody knows that talk radio is nothing but pompous, over blown, verbal diarrhea. Talk radio is just something to make you hate the rest of the world in the comfort of your car and then once you turn it off, it’s back to reality.

Secondly, nobody knew what Mirecki looked like. It wasn’t until yesterday that I saw a picture of the guy. You’re telling me that two good old boys driving a pick-up went and found a photo of the guy, stalked him and then laid the smack down just because he doesn’t like the religious right? If it’s true, then those guys just put more effort into their political convictions than most people put into their marriage.

Finally, (and this is horrible) why didn’t they kill him? Or at least put a real hurt on him. Reports say he was released with a few cuts and bruises, if somebody really wanted to make a point, if they really wanted to put the fear of God into people then they wouldn’t do it with a slap fight. Notice that other religious fanatics like Osama and his crew take heads off when they believe their religion has been offended; I’d expect no less from truly dedicated Christians.

Anyway, hopefully I’m wrong about all of this and it was simply two cowards who left Mirecki relatively unharmed but a little shaken. In the end, you have to take Mirecki at his word because he has offered first hand testimony of the incident and not burning bushes and flowery prose dictated by an invisible person on which to rely.

Additionally, don’t think that I support ID one bit because the Mirecki assault seems a little shaky by my estimation. I don’t have much respect for most people of faith . . . whether that faith rests in the scientific method or in ancient superstitions born out of heatstroke in the desert. My favorite description of deeply religious people is that they are merely folks “who can’t drink in front of each other.”

I’m a student of human nature and I’d like to theorize that we’ll all be surprised about how little follow-up there is regarding this story. Jerry Agar will be able to account for his whereabouts and play off all of the hate he’s been inciting. And hopefully, we will discover that the vast majority of us have yet to become so radical in our beliefs that we take to beating the crap out of one another for differing opinions. But I could be wrong; God knows it happens all the time.